I rarely come on here anymore, moved to FA. If you want my FA username, please just comment and I'll gladly give it to you.

As you all probably are aware, this panther dragon ended her relationship with the white tiger she was in a relationship with for two years. Perhaps Deviantart isn't the best place for me to write of such things but I choose to write them here and so I shall.

In the period of the last few months that him and I were a couple I would cry every night and felt alone (that's not even goddamn close to how horrible I felt). He would push me away when I tried to cuddle... The relationship was dead. I stayed in it for lack of knowledge in what else to do. Upon this time I found comfort in someone else. It seemed that whenever the pain chose to comsume me he was there for me. Tears would be streaming hot down my cheeks and even when I had the comfort of two dear friends... It ke me home (it was cold, afterall) the real reason I wished to stay seemed to be that I liked his company. I couldn't really say anything about wanting to stay so I just waved and said it was nice meeting him.

This was July. Now in November Mikael and I (after a rather nasty fight) were invited to a friends party. After a period of no contact with Miika at all, him and another friend came to pick us up. Mikael, still angry from our fight wouldn't speak to me. I didn't know the other friend. And then, much to my surprise to be honest (I was shy, you know, and had been crying most of the night) this attractive man from the Perry festival spoke to me first. It felt good just to be asked how I was, something no one really took the time to ask me before.

We spoke for a while at the party, I drank his drink at the bar (And for that I apologize to you once more, darling, they passed me the glass and I was unaware) The next night, Mikael "broke up" with me and my heart hurt... Not because of the break up but because I wanted nothing more than to speak with Miika. I added him to my msn and I believe spoke to him almost every night for a while. While everyone else whom said things would be alright and gave me their support only brought sorrow, he seemed to be able to pull be out of the dark hole I buried myself in and make me laugh... Upon falling asleep one night after speaking with him, I noted quietly to myself. "Wow. Not one tear." The pain was finally going away...

After an attempt to speak with Mikael and tell him I wanted to talk as friends (which he so kindly did not answer, and chose to not speak to me for another three weeks... And still hasn't) a period of three weeks had gone by, herein Miika and I spoke until the wee hours of the night...

Present day, Miika and I have decided to become an official couple. After the most romantic move by him. "Dinner and a movie?" "Well.." "Do you like gourtmet?" "..Well, yes." "Okay, and wine? Perhaps some champagne and a movie afterwards?" Well. Stunned, and if anyone knows how stunned I was it's him... I accepted the offer.

Here comes the personal part, Miika-love.

I was terrified. Terrified to let myself enjoy your company from this point forward. Scared of having my heart stepped on again. Mikael ruined my belief in love... And I found it difficult to let myself accept the feelings I had for you. Perhaps I still am to an extent... But when I'm in your arms I feel like nothing could harm me. I've many times been laying with you just listening to the silence and wanted to say things along the lines of, "I might be falling in love with you." or even just "I love you." Because those three words are still beautiful, and I think part of me longs to hear them on your lips. Guess I'm still a little afraid, and for that I apologize to you. Just give me some more time on that.

Aside from the bad sides of things, I feel warm and happy when I'm with him, msn, phone, real life, it doesn't really matter. He's helped me already become stronger and proud to be who I am. It's all about confidence, baby. I could spend countless hours talking about the little things in life and still spend more. I think that if my belief for love will be restored, it will be by him. He's also an amazing kisser, I might add, and has beautiful eyes. Had to add it in, since I'm letting everything out.

I'm truly happy. I thank you for that.. From the depths of my heart. You're an amazing person who deserves nothing more than the very best in life and as long as you're with me I will do everything in my power to make sure you get at least close to that. I can't do miracles, sadly, so close to the best will have to suffice.

Saying I love you would be the perfect way to bring this to a close, huh? Text isn't nearly good enough for that though, so.

I think I'll end it by just saying...

Thank you.

Oh, and sorry for the wait.

I love you all. Thank you all for your countless comments, favorites, watches, and support as life goes on. If I could, I would marry you all.

Ah well.. I should feel good.
At least now he can be happy.. That's what love is about.
Taking care of something you think is priceless

... Anyways. I'm feeling pretty low and horrible. But there's a fun contest on Subeta hosted by me. The top prize is a Dark Matter Potion worth 2 mil sP and a minion worth 200k or less. You can see the potion in my trades, so you know I have it.

All of you lovely Subetians should go join here [link] and give it your best shot... It's not that difficult of a character, to be honest. Some art would also help cheer me up and keep me chugging along... Every day gets greyer.

I love you all. <3 Now go join at [link] and then join my contest (link above) and be rich only moments after joining.

</3 Nevermore.

Male: "I didn't think you'd get over us that quickly."

...

Female: "Maybe it's my way of dealing with the pain."

Duh, nuh uh. I'm twitterpatted.